For my entire life, I’ve been fighting to overcome some issues from my past, and I realized I can’t win this battle on my own. Trying to go at this alone has been exhausting, and has been preventing me from living my life to the fullest in many ways. I know that I will be so much happier, and I will be so much better in all aspects of my life. I will also be a much better friend, and partner, and I even think this will help me improve my ability to do my work. I am doing this for me, but I am also doing this to benefit all of the people in my life who matter. I have always been an extremely kind, generous, supportive, and trustworthy person, and this will never change. But it’s finally time I show myself the same consideration.
Even though I’ve always encouraged the people I care about to ask for help (including from me), to fight for their happiness, and to also to live completely authentically, I was never really completely able to do so myself, and for different reasons, many stemming from my past. I am an extremely emotional, vulnerable, and affectionate person, but have been hiding some of these best parts of myself, and for different reasons, some conscious, and many others subconscious. The last thing I am is hard or tough, yet this is often the image I’m conveying to many. No more. It’s time that my soft, vulnerable, emotional, caring, and affectionate side, who I REALLY am, and how I feel on the inside 100% of the time, is what the people who truly matter to me see, feel, and experience.
I realize that asking for help, and showing my emotions, fears, and hope, is not a sign of weakness, nor is it anything to be ashamed of. Admitting that I can not do this alone is a sign of strength, and I actually feel really proud of myself. So while I’m feeling extremely emotional right now, and also scared, I feel like this tremendous weight has been lifted from my shoulders, and I have never felt so hopeful, relieved, and also free. I already feel so different.
I am extremely thankful to my friend for inspiring me to do this for myself. She never mentioned therapy, but after we talked, I did so much reflecting, and took a really honest and deep look at myself, and the decision was a no-brainer.
I wasn’t planning on writing this article, or at least sharing it publicly. But in order to be my most authentic, happiest, and strongest self, I am no longer going to be afraid of showing my emotions, vulnerabilities, and sensitive side, as doing so has been holding me back in many ways. No more.
If you think you need help, never be afraid to ask, and do not be afraid to fight for yourself, and for your happiness. You are worth it.